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Children at mass... a welcome disruption?

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..My husband and I always had a different kind of ‘Mass kit’ on hand when our children were young. It contained storybooks, paper and crayons, a few soft toys, and several packets of sultanas. When the children became restive, the contents of our Mass kit came to the rescue...."
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..The body of Christ, the Church, includes people of all ages, from the youngest to the oldest: all must be made welcome and no one excluded..."

“Let the little children come to me”

I was touched by this recent heartfelt plea from a young father:
I am married with two small children – a boy two and a girl three-and-a-half. We all try to make it to Mass every Sunday.

Of course it is impossible to get them to sit perfectly quietly throughout the whole Mass. We do our best and I think we usually do OK. They almost never scream or cry, generally it is babbling, shifting about, and dropping things on the floor.

However, at our parish church there are hardly any children at all, so Mass is very quiet, which can make the sound of a talking child seem disruptive in comparison. Some people clearly resent our children making a small amount of noise. There are cold stares and sometimes snubbing of us at the sign of peace.
My wife and I now spend most of Mass concentrating on keeping the children quiet. Often I’ll take our son out after communion, not because he is so noisy, but because I can’t take the tension any longer. Once my wife burst into tears in the car after a Mass where an elderly couple continually frowned and made harrumphing noises at us.

Would it be possible to have an announcement read out one Sunday that reminded people that the Church wants children to come to Mass and that the small chaos that children cause should be a joy rather than a problem?

I can understand both sides of the story here, having in the past known the difficulty of attending Mass with three young children and in more recent years being present when parents have allowed their children to run freely and noisily around the church during Mass.

I believe that a little tolerance and consideration need to be shown by both parties – the older Mass attendees and the parents of young children.

Of the first group I would ask:
If Mass were a time for private prayer, or a performance which required hearing every word, then noisy children might present a problem. But it is not: Mass is a communal act of worship. Does a little noise really stop the community offering its prayer and praise to God?
What did Christ mean when he said: “Let the little children come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs ”?
If we don’t make a young child welcome at Mass, can we really be surprised when the child grows up and chooses to stay away?

Of parents, I would ask:
What effort do you make to keep your children occupied during Mass so that they don’t become too disruptive?
Most people think of a ‘Mass kit’ as the set of basic requirements that a priest carries with him for celebrating Mass in homes and institutions. My husband and I always had a different kind of ‘Mass kit’ on hand when our children were young. It contained storybooks, paper and crayons, a few soft toys, and several packets of sultanas. When the children became restive, the contents of our Mass kit came to the rescue.
The body of Christ, the Church, includes people of all ages, from the youngest to the oldest: all must be made welcome and no one excluded.
From ' Children at Mass' in Liturgy Lines by Elizabeth Harrington
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  • Desiderio Desideravi
  • Archive
    • In Search of Peace
    • Word of God Sunday
    • Living Lent >
      • Forty Lenten Ideas
      • Lent is a time to grow in the faith
      • Walking the Stations of the Cross this Lent
    • Saints and Souls >
      • Saintly Endeavours
      • Let the Dead Have November
      • Why We Pray for the Faithful Departed
    • Lay Liturgical Ministry >
      • Talents for Ministry
      • Nine Steps to Becoming a Better Lector
      • Ministers of Communion​
    • Music Matters >
      • Repertoire and Renewal
      • Liturgical Song and Evangelisation ​
      • 5 tips for effective music ministry
    • 50 Days of Easter >
      • Celebrating Easter's 50 Days
      • Aspects of the Ascension
      • Reflections for Pentecost Sunday
    • Saint Joseph >
      • Patris corde (With a Father's Heart)
      • Celebrating St Joseph in the Liturgy
      • St Joseph in Scripture
    • Christmas 2020 >
      • On the Meaning and Importance of the Nativity Scene
      • Botticelli - The Mystical Nativity
      • The Season of Christmas
    • Planning for Christmas 2020 >
      • Planning Christmas Masses 2020
      • Re-emerging With Purpose
      • Beyond Welcome: Show, Don't Tell
    • Signs and Symbols >
      • Sacramental Signs and Symbols
      • The cross reminds us of the sacrifices of the Christian life
      • Signs & Symbols: A Reflection
    • Looking Forward >
      • Solemnities on Saturdays
      • Our Family at Mass in the Age of Technology
      • Is your RCIA open all year-round? - Embracing 'Pyjama Catechesis'
    • Eucharist as Living Memory >
      • Memory is not Something Private
      • So what's wrong with a Virtual Mass?
      • The Middle of Nowhere
    • What have we learned from lockdown? >
      • Church After Coronavirus - New Understandings of Social MIssion
      • Virus and Vocation
      • Real Presence and Virtual Liturgies
    • Celebrating Holy Week in COVID times​ >
      • Coronavirus and the Eucharist
      • How to celebrate the liturgy when there is no Mass
      • Holy Week At Home
    • Solidarity and Unity >
      • Taking Communion to those who Self-Isolate
      • Peace and Solidarity
      • United to Christ We Are Never Alone
    • Preparing for Lent >
      • The Weeks of Lent in the Australian Imagination
      • How to Prepare for Lent
      • It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Lent
    • Liturgy with Children >
      • Using the Lectionary for Masses with Children
      • Praying Morning Prayer with Primary School Children
      • Directory for Masses with Children
    • Praying For Rain >
      • National Drought Prayer Campaign
      • Praying for Rain - Prayer Resources
      • A Ritual of Lament
    • Christian Initiation >
      • CATECHUMENATE - Rolling Year Round
      • Inculturating Christian Life in the Digital World
      • Tweens and Teens in the RCIA
    • Season of Creation >
      • Season of Creation September 1 - October 4
      • The Cosmic Song of 'Laudato Si'
    • Ordinary Time >
      • The Season of Ordinary Time
      • Sunday - The Original Feast
      • Luke's Gospel
    • Saints and Feasts >
      • Mary and the Saints
      • Saints and Martyrs
      • Who Are the Saints?
    • Eucharist >
      • The Centrality of the Eucharist
      • Space Matters
      • Can you drink the cup?
    • Altar Servers
    • Ministers of the Word
    • Children's Liturgy of the Word on Sundays
    • Advent Issues >
      • Advent Resources >
        • Advent
        • Music in Advent
        • Advent BOB
      • The Season of Advent
    • Liturgy Preparation
    • Communion
    • A pastoral map to baptism
    • The Role of the Deacon
    • Music Ministry
    • Reconciliation
    • Women Deacons, Music Choices and Lent
    • Data Projectors
    • The Christmas Season >
      • The Book of Blessings
      • Formation in Liturgy
    • The Year of Youth
    • Should we celebrate Australia Day?
    • Marriage
    • Easter Triduum
    • ANZAC Day
    • Funerals
    • The problem of translation
    • Advent resources for families
  • Subscribe